And it feels like I am just too close to love you

Hello,
how are you all? I know none of you ever comment (I am for real crying on the inside here) so it was a much wasted question, and typing in all honesty.So in reality, I do not even know if anyone is reading this blog.
But enough about that!

So this is what has been going on in my life since I last updated, which was earlier this month if I am not mistaken. I could just go and look, but I am lazy and who care really?
Okay, so I have had my two exams. The first one was on the 17th of May (hurra for Norge liksom...), and it was on Television, society and morality. In all honesty, I thought it went quite well. I've never been so quick to start writing, but you know, it is usually the one you think went the best which turnes out to be the worse one, isn't it so. I guess we'll just have to see. I do not really remember which questions I did. One about television as a moral educator, I believe- that one was really easy. Something about the effects of television (like the effects model etc) and I think the last one was 'look at two television programs you've watched recently and use them to explain how they impose virtues such as "duty" etc on the audiance'.

My outfit for 17th May. I also wore my black heels. I was fab!

After this exam I went back to the flat and made applecake for Pia and I- I feel like a right 50s housewife; wearing a nice dress and heels + my apron. It was such a good look though, I felt so much better baking dressed like that. Like I was some kind of kitchen goddess or something! And I'm still single, I just don't understand! jijijiji! Pia and I had a lovely celebration with Scouserwives, applecake with ice cream and indian dinner. It was all well lush. And we may or may not have eaten the whole cake + ice cream except for the one small piece Jack had. #Fatista much?

I make a mean applecake, no?

My terror exam was on the day after and it really wasn't that interesting. I wrote about the homo sacer, my favourite topic in terror. It is really interesting, as it is all about how people become homo sacers when they basically have lost their basic human rights. So a homo sacer back in the day would have been the witches, who were not given fair trailes etc since they had excepted the Devil into their lives and bla bla bla. Today, a homo sacer might be the prisoners at Guantanamo bay- or just prisoners of terror. They are not given a fair trail, and are just found guilty (in the States, not everywhere, of course). They have been reduced to nothing more than biological bodies as they have all their rights taken away from them and because they are treated as if they are worthless. I also argues that the countries which the U.S has declared war against were turned into homo sacers, as they [the US] do not care about how many or who gets killed in the prosess of winning the war on terror. Husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters just become collateral damage, meaningless faces who mean nothing as long as the US get to prove their point. Like I said, I find the issues of terror really interesting, and it is so much more complicated than I first thought.

On the 19th, Pia and I went down to Fylde Bar to watch the Champions League final and boy was that tense! we ended up stressdrinking throughout the whole thing. Both of us got so involved, and I suppose it just represented how much we've come to (and this hurts to say) like Chelsea FC. We've just watched so many of their matches this season. I've watched more Chelsea matches than Liverpool, I even like more Chelsea players than I like Liverpool players at them moment, how sad isn't that? I guess what I'm trying to say is that we've invested quite a bit into them this season, we even went to see them play against Everon. So seeing them win the Champions League was amazing, especially because Torres (of course who else?) deserved it so much. I was gutted about Drogis leaving Chelsea though... Its a great loss, but now Torres can finally get the role he deserves ans has been working so hard for. I won't tell you about the massive breakdown I had on the 15th when I thought he didn't get called-up for la seleccion (there were a flood of tears though) but it turned out to be fine, and he has now joined la Seleccion and is training with them for the up-and-coming friendlies before the Euro. He is also going to the in the Euro-squad. 90% certain at this point. He won't start, that much is obvious, Llorente will probably be first choice, but I do believe that del Bosque will give him a fair chance to prove himself. These friendlies are imporant for him, I think. He might not play tomorrow, but I'm hoping that he will during the next friendly because seeing Nandolicious or Freckle-face in that La Roja shirt is my favourite, even over Nandolicious all freckly and tan on the beautiful Ibiza beaches.

I may or may not have been very emotional when I got back to my room that nigth and looked through all the Chelsea/Nandolicious celebration pictures...

Other than this, I've just been sitting outside in the sun, because we've finally got some of that. It has been seriously warm, over 25C everyday for the past week, and its great! I'm wearing my cute dresses everyday. I'm also quite tanned now (I was also seriously sunburned) which is great because I can actually wear these dresses without tights and not look like a twat, like so many of these Brits! lol The only problem of course is that no one else is finished so I'm kind of alone and terribly bored. So far I've packed 2 suitcases, one for when I'm going home in July- it is filled with clothes I no longer have use for, like winter jumpers and so on, the other is for when I go to Kyiv. Just some random clothes I don't need to wear when I'm here. I've still got plenty i my wardrobe still.

The tan I got after the fist day... the tan line is much more visable now.

Tomorrow it's Eurovision watching, but I'm not sure where I'm watching it. I'm just going with whatever Pia decides really. I know that my flatmates are watching it here in the flat, and the Scandinavian Society are watching it at County bar. So we'll see. We were also suppose to BBQ (or Grillex as I like to call it now), but I have no money so that looks a bit grim right now. On Sunday it's Unicef Soccer Aid at Old Trafford and I'm going with Pia (WHAT A SHOCKER, NO?!) and Christina. I've never been to Old Trafford, so that will fun! After that I'll have the Emirates and Stamford Bridge left of stadiums I really want to visit here in England. Anyway, the celebrities arrive from 5:30 so that's when we aim to be there. Here is a list of the line-ups for the two teams:
England Celebs:

• Jamie Theakston
• Marvin Humes (JLS)
• Aston Merrygold (JLS)
• Ben Shephard
• Jonathan Wilkes
• John Bishop
• Jason Isaacs
• Paddy McGuinness
• Mark Owen
• Olly Murs
• Robbie Williams (C)

The Legends:

• Martin Keown
• Teddy Sheringham
• Des Walker
• Kevin Phillips
• David Seaman
• Graeme Le Saux

Manager: Sam Allardyce
Assistant Manager: Peter Reid
Coach: Bradley Walsh


"International" Celebs:

• Michael Sheen (C)
• Will Ferrell
• Gerard Butler
• Mike Myers
• Gordon Ramsay
• Patrick Kielty
• James McAvoy
• Sergio Pizzorno (Kasabian)
• Woody Harrelson
• Edward Norton
• Joe Calzaghe

The legends

• Edwin van der Sar
• Jaap Stam
• Freddie Ljungberg
• Roy Keane
• Hernan Crespo
• Clarence Seedorf

Manager: Kenny Dalglish (King Kenny omg ;_______________; )
Assistant Manager: Ian Rush

That's it for now I suppose.

Listening to:  We Are Young - Fun
Mood:

Hot.

Skyping with mum and Zushi like a boss.

It's Tetris!

So guess what you guys! I'm about to start week 9 our of 10 of this term! How fucking crazy isn't that? Personally, I cannot believe it. Seriously, I am pretty damn shocked my this relvelation I had. Week 9. You know what that means? In a week, I will start my last week in the last 'official' and proper term at uni. Mental, that is what it is! We will hopefully get our exam timetable this up-coming week, so I will finally be able to plan my summer a bit more and find out how I'm going to do the Euro + Exam thing. I hope I have my exams really early, just so I can be finished with them and so I do not have anything else to worry about except for tripping on my robe during graduation and not finding a place to stay while in Kyiv.

Because yeah, that thing called Graduation is coming up really soon! For those of you who don't know it, I'll be graduating on the 17th of July at 2:30 pm I believe it is. We got an email the other day about it. So I have now booked my place and got my mum a ticket for the event. But for those of you who can't be there in person, but who want to get in the action, you can still watch them mess up my name! Amazing news isn't it? Because I'm sure you all would very much love to watch me stumble across the stage, red-faced as hell. It will be glorious and not to be missed. So you are probably wondering how this is fact possible? Well, my dear friends, Lancaster University has an online stream that shows the graduation cermonies all over the world! Yes, it is magnificent, no? Anyway, I shall come back with more news about this as it is actually approaching, cannot be bother by doing it now.

There isn't a lot happening here in lancaster at the moment, at least not with me. I don't have time for silly student life things at this point. And that is actually sadly true. I have so much to do that I hardly have time to breathe! But so far, I've got it under control, I just need to stick to my plan, which though I have never been any good at, i will just have to do. There is no other option. Except for joining the circus. Because that is still my back-up plan if everything else fails!
I have to go to the learning zone again to day with Pia, as I am suppose to finish up this essay for this week. Its 4000 words, so I better get started to be honest. But ugh, I'm so fed up with Le'Zone at the moment! Pia and I have spent our whole weekend in there, just trying (and failing) to work. it's dreadful. But it has to be done so...

Labrinth at The Sugarhouse

Oh, we also went to see Labrinth on Sunday at the Sugarhouse! Though he didn't come until 3 hours later than expected, the show was really good. I really enjoyed watching him preform. For those of you who don't know who it is, it is this guy, check him out below. He even did a little jingle with his guitar, which was quite cool. I'd deffo go and see him preform again, once he has released his album. Another person I'd love to see is Tinie Tempah. I really love Tinie Tempah, he is awesome, and probably would be quite good like. Damn me, moving back to Norway! And who will I go to concerts and shit with now, when I'm moving to a place where I have no friends?! Christ, I haven't thought about this no friends aspect yet. Ah bugger!


Oh, shit, I better get going actually! lecture ahead! 
Much love, Keisha x







Listening to: Black & Yellow -Wiz Kalifha
Mood:

Hungry

Now you're there cleaning up the mess they left

Wiii! It’s February! So much to do, and so so so little time to do anything at all! Can you believe it? In 5 months, I’ll be graduating? Wearing the cape and everything. It is absolutely mad if you ask me! I can hardly believe it at all. Though I do spend about 90% of my time thinking about it. That, and all the work I have to do over the next two months. I mean, shit, we're in week 4 now. Next week we'll be half way through our last term. When did that happen? I Sure as hell don't know. I feel it was just last week or so that I boarded that plane that took me to Manchester for the first time and I remember so perfectly the moment when I was standing there alone in my room, bracing myself before opening the door and putting on my most winning smile and going into what seemed like the scariest place ever; our kitchen.

It is so weird to think how long ago that was. Time flies by, I suppose. And believe me, it really does. I feel like the weeks just fly by while I'm half-way stuck behind in some odd way. I cannot explain it, but it is just the way it feels right now. I'm fighting to get through all the things I have to do. It is both good and bad, I suppose. I feel a lot more motivated to work than i've ever felt before and that if because of a lot of different reasons. The fact that I'm graduating is a big factor. So is the fact that I actually have modules I enjoy this term.

My degree has been a bit of a hit-and-miss if I'm to be completely honest. What I thought I signed up for, and what I actually did sign up for ended up being two very different things. I don't regret sociology per say, but I do regret not doing sociology and social anthropology. And as much as I love the people I have meet here, and the this beautiful and lovely town that Lancaster is, I regret not going to a uni that was not so old fashion in its teaching methods. I suppose, in a lot of ways, a theoretical degree was never something I should have gone for, but then again, I do not enjoy practical subjects. I love learning about society. I enjoy it. Society interests me. Politics interests me. Culture interests me. There was no way of escaping a theoretical degree. It's a shame really. Because I do feel like university... or perhaps these social sciences are all about theories, and all we ever learn is old knowledge. Do not get me wrong, history is as important as anything else, but how are we ever suppose to think for ourselves when all we do is re-write what others have said before us? There is little room for personal opinions and thoughts, and I despise that. I cannot stand this fact. To me, there is nothing more important to me, then being able to say what I mean/think/feel about a subject.

And at the end of the day, if I am to be completely honest again, I do not see how I am no prepared to go out there and find work. I do not see how I'm more qualified than what I was 3 years ago. Yes, I can tell you what Marx, Simmel, Durkheim and a billion other sociologies thought and argued, but when will this help me? I can write a 4000 word essay yes, but I do not plan on having a job where that I going to be much needed. I'm not going to be a lecturer. So what has my degree given me in return?

I find myself at a cross-road. At this point in time, I have no idea how to get anywhere. A job in the FA seems highly unlikely with anything less than a first, which isn't happening. I need a master, but where can i take it, and in what? International Relations? Norway, England, Spain, Canada... I don't know anymore.
But I suppose I still have some time to ponder over these things. At least for a few more months. As of now, i just need to do my readings and my essays and think about the fact that summer isn't so far off. Nor is Kyiv and Spain.

This entry ended up being a whole lot more depressing than what i had planned. I was all set out to write a super happy entry. I fail massively it seems. Oh well, I try harder next time.


Listening to: Believe - Safetysuit.
Mood: 

Thoughtful

I've got a new motto: